Creating connections with Adoption Choices families

Posts tagged ‘respect’

Supernanny 911!

It looks so easy on TV!  How come when Supernanny enters a home, she immediately gets respect and results?  It seems somewhat real but can it be that easy? 

Maybe those parents just aren’t in control of their kids.  Those parents just don’t get the basic principles behind raising children.  Those parents let their kids act like barbarians.  They don’t say no with conviction.  They are letting their kids walk all over them.  They let their tweens set the rules of the house.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH THEM?   WHAT IS WRONG WITH US? 

We follow Supernanny’s instructions………..…..sort of.

We are consistent……………………………….…….…most of the time.  

We hold our ground………..…………………………..usually.

We say NO firmly and with conviction…………..typically.

We remember to praise good behavior………….more often than not.

We follow through with consequences ……….…sometimes.

We take a tone of authority……………………….….at least we think we do.

We demand the respect that we deserve……….occasionally.

SO WHAT ARE WE DOING WRONG?

As you may have predicted, we know exactly what we are doing wrong!  But how do we stop.  We do try to be strong, firm, and demand respect but we get worn down.  How many times can we put Bruiser on the step for a timeout when he gets up the second we turn our backs?  We have spent upwards of an hour with the back and forth between the step and wherever he chooses to go.    Oh…but then Bruiser’s twin, Princess, she has her own little method of removing parental power.  She will go to the step……and make the best of it.  She doesn’t consider it punishment.  She will sit and sing a song and basically defy all logical consequences inherent in the “dreaded” timeout.  Then, there is the big brother.  JJ too has his own little twist to the timeout, he develops some sort of hypochondriacal response to the timeout.  First it is the moan, then the flailing hands due to the pain, then the ice that he needs to sooth his aching head…..eventually he will make it to the step but not before the academy award winning performance of “Why Does Everyone Hate Me?”

What are we doing wrong?  Basically, a little bit of everything.  We know where to make changes.  We try to adjust our behavior but haven’t been too successful.  I guess that our only option is to bank on the old parent adage, “this stage too will pass.”

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Adrienne is a recently unemployed (correction-not so recent) mom of a pre-teen son (JJ) who has aspirations of owning a sports company, a set of boy/girl toddler twins—one (Bruiser) with a compulsion to build and hoard, and the other (Princess) a diva in training, a Havanese (cute, fluffy dog) velcro-ed  to my ankle and a wonderful husband, David, who keeps the family happy and wife sane!

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